I wish i could give up everything juz to live a happy and ordinary life, free from any worries. I wish that my mind wasnt tainted by the evils this world have to offer, of lies deceptions betryal and other horrible things. How i wish i was still young, singing home on the range. No ambitions, no pressure, no schemes, juz saying what u feel like saying and not hurting anyone or being hurt. One can share their love there and no one will be sad or lonely, juz happy.
Unfortunately, such a world can never exsist. Not in my life time at least. That brief happiness i felt has subsided, leaving me addicted to it. Once again my theory has proven me correctly, with extreme happiness comes extreme sadness.
I didnt exactly have a happy childhood, but how can i say i didnt have one if i dont noe whats happiness. Haha isnt it ironic, for all i know i may have been blessed with happiness yet i didnt appreciate it. There have been times when suicidal thoughts cross my mind. I know its not uncommon for ppl, but the only reason why i am not dead yet is A)I am not that stupid as to waste my life away after being brought up by my parents for so long B)I live every other day, hoping to find my true happiness, whereby it will last if not forever at least for a long time.
Its hard for me to escape the dark side now, i want to be honest and speak the way u do, from the bottom of ur heart, without worrying that what u say will be used against u. But all i can do is to admire what u do with such ease while it seems impossible for me to do. I wish u and ur prince everlasting happiness although u wont be reading it.
li jun wei
take me to a place faraway.
11:08 PM
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